Cord cutting is one of the most common reasons people come into our shop looking for candles. Someone is out of a relationship, a friendship, or a job, and the situation is technically over, but it still takes up space in their head. Cord cutting is the practice of formally marking that ending and calling your own energy back.
This guide covers what candle color to use, how the ritual is traditionally done, and the questions we get asked most often behind the counter.
What Color Candle Is Used for Cord Cutting?
Black is the traditional color for cord cutting, and white is the most widely accepted substitute. In most folk practices black is the color of absorbing, banishing, and severing, which is what this working is for. White is treated across nearly every tradition as the all-purpose candle. It can stand in for any color and it carries cleansing and release on its own terms.
How the colors are usually understood:
- Black - severing, banishing, absorbing what you are releasing.
- White - cleansing, neutrality, and a valid substitute for any other color. Plenty of practitioners use white for the entire working.
- Two candles, black and white - a common pairing. Black cuts, white restores.
For the full color reference across every kind of candle work, see our guide to ritual candle colors and their meanings.
Our Cord Cutting Ritual Candles come as a pair of white tapers dressed with herbs and oils in Nashville. White handles both halves of this working, the release and the restoring afterward, which is why we use it for the pair.
How to Do a Cord Cutting Ritual With Candles
There is no single correct version of this. Traditions vary and personal intuition matters more than exact procedure. Here is the structure most people use.
1. Get clear on what you are cutting
Name it specifically. Not "negativity" but the actual person, job, situation, or habit. Vague intentions produce vague rituals. Some people write it on a slip of paper.
2. Set up your space
Clear a flat, heat-safe surface. Place two candles a few inches apart in secure holders. One represents you. One represents what you are releasing. If you cleanse your space with sage, palo santo, or a cleansing spray, do it now.
3. Connect the two candles
Traditionally a length of natural cotton string or thread is tied loosely between the two candles, representing the cord itself. Keep the string well away from the flames.
4. Light both candles and say what you mean
Light the candle representing you first, then the other. Speak out loud. Plain language works better than borrowed script. Something like: I release what connects me to this. I call my energy back to me.
5. Cut the cord
Cut the string at the midpoint with scissors or a blade. This is the moment the ritual turns on. Some people cut once and sit with it. Others repeat the words as they cut.
6. Let the candles burn down safely
Traditionally both candles burn all the way out, but never leave a burning candle unattended. If you need to leave the room, snuff it and relight later. Ritual does not require unsafe fire.
7. Dispose of the remains
Most practitioners take the cut string and the wax from the candle representing the other party off the property, into an outside trash bin or buried away from home. Wax from your own candle can be kept if you want.
Common Questions
When should I do a cord cutting ritual?
Whenever you feel drained by something already over. Many people prefer a waning moon, which is traditionally associated with release, or the days just before a new moon. If you need it tonight, do it tonight. Timing is a preference, not a requirement.
Do I need to do it more than once?
Sometimes. Long relationships and family ties often get worked on more than once. If the situation still occupies your attention weeks later, repeating it is normal.
What if I still feel connected afterward?
That is common and does not mean the ritual failed. Cord cutting is a practice for marking and processing an ending, not a switch that deletes a feeling. It works best alongside the ordinary work of moving on.
Can I do this for a family member or someone still in my life?
Yes. Cord cutting is not about ending contact or wishing harm. Many people cut cords with a parent or coworker they still see regularly. The intent is to stop the energetic drain, not the relationship.
Is this the same as a banishing or a hex?
No. Cord cutting is directed at the connection, not the person. Nothing in this practice is aimed at causing anyone harm.
Does the candle color change the outcome?
No candle grants an outcome, whatever its color. Color is a focusing tool that helps you hold an intention clearly. Use what you have and what feels right.
A Note on What Ritual Is For
Candle work is a practice for focus, intention, and marking transitions. It is not medical or mental health treatment. If you are dealing with something heavy, ritual can sit alongside real support from people who can help, not in place of it.
Candle Safety
Trim wicks to a quarter inch. Burn on a heat-safe surface away from curtains, paper, and anything else that catches. Keep away from children and pets. Never leave a burning candle unattended.
Getting Set Up
We keep ritual candles in stock year round, along with obsidian, smoky quartz, and black tourmaline, which are the stones most often paired with release work. Everything ships from Nashville, and if you are local you can come see us on Gallatin Pike and we will walk you through it in person.